Funniest call or pull over you've had? [Archive] - BARF

motorman4life

05-20-2005, 12:45 PM

I hate name-droppers. "Officer, I'm good friends with Sergeant So-and-so!" Oh, I guess you missed his last 2 promotions, he is Captain So-and-so now!

Anyhow, I pull this guy over for a red light violation and he starts in about how he is good friends with Officer XYZ of my department. Only problem.. he used MY name! I'm like, really? "Oh yeah, we went to school together and he was best man at my wedding!" I'm looking at this guy trying to figure out where I know him from and it comes to me.. I had arrested him for DUI on Christmas Eve, about 2 months earlier! I let him dig himself deeper about how he is the Godfather for my kids, then I walk back and write the ticket. I come back and he says, "Why are you giving me a ticket, can't you call XYZ and he can vouch for me?" (Real balls, huh?) So I have him step out of the car and ask for the keys and he asks why. I said, "I'm towing your car, not so much because your license is suspended from when *I* arrested you for drunk driving on Christmas Eve, but because you are the biggest liar I've ever met."

He looks at my nametag and looks at me and says, "Man Dude, you look totally different with that helmet on!"

Lucien

05-20-2005, 01:08 PM

:laughing
What a dufus! Amazing!

Ezekiel

05-20-2005, 02:36 PM

hahahaha, you gotta admire the effort though!!

wilit

05-20-2005, 03:22 PM

Hahaha.... That's a sweet story.

throttleone

05-22-2005, 04:27 PM

:laughing :burnout

throttle

05-22-2005, 07:55 PM

f'ing morons are always good for a laugh!

Dragon

05-22-2005, 08:05 PM

A concerned citizen called in:

"All hell is breakin' loose in the trailer park! Don't know where, don't know how- but he wan'ts something done about it!"

Annonymous reporting party

I have the CAD printout in my archives- cleared as UTL

CHAMPIONR6

05-25-2005, 12:10 AM

Holy $%&* I would have pissed my pants ... how did you keep a straight face - what a dummy but then again he was a little intoxicated the first time you two met ...haha

Originally posted by motorman4life
I hate name-droppers. "Officer, I'm good friends with Sergeant So-and-so!" Oh, I guess you missed his last 2 promotions, he is Captain So-and-so now!

Anyhow, I pull this guy over for a red light violation and he starts in about how he is good friends with Officer XYZ of my department. Only problem.. he used MY name! I'm like, really? "Oh yeah, we went to school together and he was best man at my wedding!" I'm looking at this guy trying to figure out where I know him from and it comes to me.. I had arrested him for DUI on Christmas Eve, about 2 months earlier! I let him dig himself deeper about how he is the Godfather for my kids, then I walk back and write the ticket. I come back and he says, "Why are you giving me a ticket, can't you call XYZ and he can vouch for me?" (Real balls, huh?) So I have him step out of the car and ask for the keys and he asks why. I said, "I'm towing your car, not so much because your license is suspended from when *I* arrested you for drunk driving on Christmas Eve, but because you are the biggest liar I've ever met."

He looks at my nametag and looks at me and says, "Man Dude, you look totally different with that helmet on!"

JesasaurusRex

05-25-2005, 02:32 AM

Originally posted by motorman4life
I hate name-droppers. "Officer, I'm good friends with Sergeant So-and-so!" Oh, I guess you missed his last 2 promotions, he is Captain So-and-so now!

Anyhow, I pull this guy over for a red light violation and he starts in about how he is good friends with Officer XYZ of my department. Only problem.. he used MY name! I'm like, really? "Oh yeah, we went to school together and he was best man at my wedding!" I'm looking at this guy trying to figure out where I know him from and it comes to me.. I had arrested him for DUI on Christmas Eve, about 2 months earlier! I let him dig himself deeper about how he is the Godfather for my kids, then I walk back and write the ticket. I come back and he says, "Why are you giving me a ticket, can't you call XYZ and he can vouch for me?" (Real balls, huh?) So I have him step out of the car and ask for the keys and he asks why. I said, "I'm towing your car, not so much because your license is suspended from when *I* arrested you for drunk driving on Christmas Eve, but because you are the biggest liar I've ever met."

He looks at my nametag and looks at me and says, "Man Dude, you look totally different with that helmet on!"

Kinda assholish to tow his car

K-dog

05-25-2005, 02:41 AM

Originally posted by JesasaurusRex
Kinda assholish to tow his car

er, it's the law. Don't drive on a suspended license. As of this year it sux even more than last.

deaconblues

05-25-2005, 09:36 AM

Jess is only saying that cos he got his ride hooked recently... if he hadn't he'd probably be chuckling along with the rest of us.

Kaesem

05-25-2005, 09:53 AM

Wonder if he will try that line again? He's a moron, and will probably get reemed even deeper next time.

VillageIdiot

05-25-2005, 11:55 AM

Originally posted by Dragon
A concerned citizen called in:

"All hell is breakin' loose in the trailer park! Don't know where, don't know how- but he wan'ts something done about it!"

Annonymous reporting party

I have the CAD printout in my archives- cleared as UTL Tell the Secret Service one.Tell the Secret Service one.Tell the Secret Service one.Tell the Secret Service one.Tell the Secret Service one.

I tell people that one it's hilarious.:laughing

JesasaurusRex

05-25-2005, 12:21 PM

Originally posted by deaconblues
Jess is only saying that cos he got his ride hooked recently... if he hadn't he'd probably be chuckling along with the rest of us.

No im saying that because now adays these LEO's tow your car depending on what mood theyre in. Its his car, i dont even think police should have the right to tow vehicles. Atleast they should let the driver have a chance to tow it home themselves.

uhmeebuh

05-25-2005, 12:32 PM

Originally posted by JesasaurusRex
No im saying that because now adays these LEO's tow your car depending on what mood theyre in. Its his car, i dont even think police should have the right to tow vehicles. Atleast they should let the driver have a chance to tow it home themselves.

Officers can't tow cars without a valid reason. It was in your thread where you got towed that an officer revealed this (Brash I believe).

This guys license was suspended. What should the officer had done? If the officer left the car on the side of the road, the tickets can amount to more than an impound.

So, why do you hate cops so much if it has nothing to do with the fact that you got towed??

VillageIdiot

05-25-2005, 12:44 PM

Originally posted by uhmeebuh
No - officers can't tow cars without a valid reason. It was in your thread where you got towed that an officer revealed this (Brash I believe).

This guys license was suspended. What should the officer had done? Let him go? Leave his car on the side of the road where the tickets can amount to more than an impound?

So, why do you hate cops so much? And it has NOTHING to do with the fact that you got towed for riding with race plastics and then mouthing off to an officer? He doesn't hate them.. He's trying to understand the reasoning behind some of the things they do....As a matter of fact I've heard him say several times over that he respects their job, and how hard they have to work.

uhmeebuh

05-25-2005, 12:47 PM

Originally posted by abn375
He doesn't hate them.. He's trying to understand the reasoning behind some of the things they do....As a matter of fact I've heard him say several times over that he respects their job, and how hard they have to work.

Then I stand corrected - sorry Jess. I must only read the threads where he bashes them...

JesasaurusRex

05-25-2005, 12:51 PM

Originally posted by uhmeebuh
Officers can't tow cars without a valid reason. It was in your thread where you got towed that an officer revealed this (Brash I believe).

This guys license was suspended. What should the officer had done? If the officer left the car on the side of the road, the tickets can amount to more than an impound.

So, why do you hate cops so much if it has nothing to do with the fact that you got towed??

I mouthed off to him only after my bike was up on the tow truck. My Licinse, Registration, Insurance were all up to date...not the point i see where your going with this, but this has nothing to do with that day. Just an abuse of power i think. No he should not have left it on the side of the road, he should have given him a ticket and sent him on his way. This suspending licinse's is bull sh*t too. I know how they love to preach that it's a privilage to have a DL...f*ck that you NEED some sort of transportation if you wanna go to school, pick up the kids from school, go grocery shopping, go to work. If my L's was suspended...again...well ill leave it at that. People have to drive. Done and done.

JesasaurusRex

05-25-2005, 12:51 PM

Originally posted by uhmeebuh
Then I stand corrected - sorry Jess. I must only read the threads where he bashes them...

:thumbup:

uhmeebuh

05-25-2005, 12:59 PM

Originally posted by JesasaurusRex
I mouthed off to him only after my bike was up on the tow truck. My Licinse, Registration, Insurance were all up to date...not the point i see where your going with this, but this has nothing to do with that day. Just an abuse of power i think. No he should not have left it on the side of the road, he should have given him a ticket and sent him on his way. This suspending licinse's is bull sh*t too. I know how they love to preach that it's a privilage to have a DL...f*ck that you NEED some sort of transportation if you wanna go to school, pick up the kids from school, go grocery shopping, go to work. If my L's was suspended...again...well ill leave it at that. People have to drive. Done and done.

OK - I'll separate the two. They just looked related. My bad...

I agree that people need top drive to get anywhere in CA and public transportation isn't a viable option. If someone's license has been suspended - they screwed up - not the officer Besides - many people convicted of DUI's get restricted driving priviledges - typically only to work and school. Out side of that they KNOW they are risking a larger penalty. This guy just took advantage of what was given to him after he screwed up. I certainly don't want a DUI driver back on the roads without any consequences.

VillageIdiot

05-25-2005, 01:01 PM

Originally posted by uhmeebuh
OK - I'll separate the two. They just looked related. My bad...

I certainly don't want a DUI driver back on the roads without any consequences. 110%:thumbup

Dopesick

05-25-2005, 01:28 PM

CHICKenstrip

05-25-2005, 01:38 PM

Originally posted by JesasaurusRex
This suspending licinse's is bull sh*t too. I know how they love to preach that it's a privilage to have a DL...f*ck that you NEED some sort of transportation if you wanna go to school, pick up the kids from school, go grocery shopping, go to work. If my L's was suspended...again...well ill leave it at that. People have to drive. Done and done.

This whole thread kinda quit being funny. I probably only worked traffic 1/100th the amount of time people like Motorman4life, brash, etc., have. And I did three fatal investigations where the suspended driver killed someone else but walked away, pretty healthy. I'm sure the victims' families thought that suspended DL stuff was crap.

motorman4life

05-25-2005, 02:39 PM

Originally posted by JesasaurusRex
No im saying that because now adays these LEO's tow your car depending on what mood theyre in. Its his car, i dont even think police should have the right to tow vehicles. Atleast they should let the driver have a chance to tow it home themselves.

Driving on a suspended license is a 30 day impound for first offense. That's about $2100 in towing and storage. 2nd offense is 90 days.

If all of the unlicensed and suspended drivers on the roads just stopped driving, think how much safer the roads would be!

Jess, wouldn't it really SUCK to get mowed down on your bike by some unlicensed and uninsured jerk that shouldn't even be on the road in the first place?

JackTheTripper

05-25-2005, 03:47 PM

Ask yourself this. Why was the guys’ license suspended?

I had mine suspended once for about a month cause I passed out for no particular reason. Was just standing there one second and the next thing I know I'm on the floor bleeding. Didn’t feel funny or anything. Just dropped. I split my chin when I fell and went in for stitches. Doctor looked me over and couldn't find anything wrong and told me he had to report it to DMV and that my license was officially suspended. I went in for a bunch of tests and they couldn't find anything and signed off that I was all clear and I got my license back.

But what if I just decided "Na, I'm OK. I'm just going to drive anyway." and there really was something wrong with me. Now you've got a guy piloting 2,500 lbs of steal around the roads that could pass out at any minute without warning. What happens next? Maybe I hit a tree. Maybe I hit another car or a bike. Maybe I plow through 30 kids at a bus stop. All because, sure.... driving is a "privilege" but hey, I had to get to the hospital for my tests so I could get my "privileges" reinstated, right?

The fact is, the officer doesn't know why the guys license is suspended. Could be the situation above or it could have been a judge that was having a bad day and took it away to "teach the guy a lesson." All the officer knows is the guy isn't supposed to be on the road.

Now unless you have both sides of the story let him do his job.

svclee

05-25-2005, 04:10 PM

Some cops can just be mean because they are having a bad day and take it out on you. Just the way it is.

Dragon

05-25-2005, 04:39 PM

Originally posted by JesasaurusRex
I mouthed off to him only after my bike was up on the tow truck. My Licinse, Registration, Insurance were all up to date...not the point i see where your going with this, but this has nothing to do with that day. Just an abuse of power i think. No he should not have left it on the side of the road, he should have given him a ticket and sent him on his way. This suspending licinse's is bull sh*t too. I know how they love to preach that it's a privilage to have a DL...f*ck that you NEED some sort of transportation if you wanna go to school, pick up the kids from school, go grocery shopping, go to work. If my L's was suspended...again...well ill leave it at that. People have to drive. Done and done.

It's not an abuse of power- it's an exercise of discretion...

When a LEO stops someone with an unsafe vehicle or a suspended DL and just gives you a ticket and drives away
There is this thing called LIABILITY.
You crash into a lil old lady after he pulls off and who do you think is gonna be named in the lawsuit besides the driver?

It's called car jail... and for most people loosing their primary form of transportation makes people think- before the get behind the wheel and what it will cost them.

Whilst filling out a 180 form... I heard:

"But Dep! I'm gonna have to ride the "shame train!"

The 'shame train' I asked?

"Yeah man- AC motherfn' Transit :laughing"

VillageIdiot

05-25-2005, 04:58 PM

Ken tell the Secret Service story:teeth

Dragon

05-25-2005, 05:16 PM

Originally posted by abn375
Ken tell the Secret Service story:teeth

Not on here :laughing a few Barfer's work for the guy :laughing

Let's just say they have really nice and fast company cars...

JesasaurusRex

05-25-2005, 07:47 PM

Originally posted by motorman4life
Jess, wouldn't it really SUCK to get mowed down on your bike by some unlicensed and uninsured jerk that shouldn't even be on the road in the first place?

Yes it would suck, but it would suck just as much if he was licinsed and insured and a nice guy who should be on the road in the first place. I donno what the statistics are but im sure its not that big of a difference in getting into an accident with somebody with a suspended liicnse over someobdy with an up to date one. Id be willing to bet the people with suspended licinse's drive even more careful in the first place just so they dont get pulled over. I've had enough of this no more posting on this subject for me, you guys think im defending the guy, which i am not, i just think a ticket woulda covered it. If he lies then he lies, you took it personal when you should not have. End of my posting on this subject.

Dragon

05-25-2005, 08:27 PM

Originally posted by JesasaurusRex
If he lies then he lies, you took it personal when you should not have.

Life just sucks sometimes, huh?

HOW CAN YOU SAY IT WASN'T PERSONAL? :laughing he used HIS FREAKIN' name for Christ's sake!

Can't get much more personal than that! I'm on my ass here :laughing

Jess- I love ya like a lil brother but READ what ya typed :toothless

Mistyz

05-25-2005, 08:43 PM

I want to hear the secret service story now :teeth

VillageIdiot

05-25-2005, 08:44 PM

Originally posted by Mistyz
I want to hear the secret service story now :teeth he won't tell it....and BTW

HELL NO WE WON'T GO. :thumbup :laughing

K-dog

05-25-2005, 08:55 PM

I dunno, I can agree with a couple things Jess said, but he's a bit bitter about it it sounds. (I just got of 1yr 6mo license suspension, so I can understand. Bike was towed at the time I lost it too, and funked up by the towing) But cops aren't the ones to be mad at. Tell yer lawmakers, they set the rules, that these poor bastards have to try so hard to keep up with. Try reading the CA constitution. :laughing

http://www.leginfo.ca.gov/yourleg.html

JesasaurusRex

05-25-2005, 09:21 PM

Originally posted by Dragon
Life just sucks sometimes, huh?

HOW CAN YOU SAY IT WASN'T PERSONAL? :laughing he used HIS FREAKIN' name for Christ's sake!

Can't get much more personal than that! I'm on my ass here :laughing

Jess- I love ya like a lil brother but READ what ya typed :toothless

He used his name just because he didnt know anybody else. Not cuz he wanted him to go back and look 4 the guy (if it wasnt him) and say i let this ass hat off because he said he knew you.

You took me off your ignore list :teeth

jwilds73

05-25-2005, 09:28 PM

WTF!~ this is supposed to be a fun thread not some whiney I been wronged by the cops thread. Start a new one for that crap. Now lets here about the ladies offering :boobies and such to get out of a ticket or just dumbass criminals with foot in mouth :blah disease etc.

K-dog

05-25-2005, 09:37 PM

I dunno, it's not that funny, but I once got pulled over by a k9 unit in arizona, and he told me his arms were too tired from beating his dog, had to set his clipboard on the car to write the ticket. lol

motorman4life

05-25-2005, 10:28 PM

Originally posted by JesasaurusRex
Yes it would suck, but it would suck just as much if he was licinsed and insured and a nice guy who should be on the road in the first place.
Just as much? Hmm.. I see it different.

I donno what the statistics are but im sure its not that big of a difference in getting into an accident with somebody with a suspended liicnse over someobdy with an up to date one.
Statistics show that suspended drivers are more than 400% more likely to flee the scene of an accident. The most common suspensions are for FTA and negligent driver. FTA is failure to appear (for court). Both would indicate they have previously demontrated their inability to drive.

Id be willing to bet the people with suspended licinse's drive even more careful in the first place just so they dont get pulled over.
That would be a stupid bet. I have stopped people drag racing on city streets with suspended license.. red light runners (unlicensed and in a stolen car). All anacdotal, but I stopped 2 suspended drivers today that weren't wearing their seatbelt.. you do the math.

i just think a ticket woulda covered it. If he lies then he lies, you took it personal when you should not have.I didn't take it personal.. he tried to make it personal. I tow ALL suspended driver vehicles. ALL. No exceptions; Baby in the car, old lady, right in front of their house, ALL of them get towed. Assholish? It goes back to what Dragon wrote. LIABILITY.

We had an officer that saw a guy stumbling down the sidewalk at 3 am.. a drunk. He was 5 blocks from home, walking from the bar. He was about 1/2 way. "Hey buddy, you need a ride home?" The nice officer puts him in the back seat. He drives him to his house and watches the guy unlock the door and go inside. Nice job, right?

Turns out, he passed out and fell inside the house. His wife found him on the floor in the living room the next morning and left him lying there for a few hours, thinking he was asleep (I guess he had slept there before?). Finally, she prods him and he is unresponsive. Dead. Guess who the wife sued? "If you cops had done your job and arrested him, he would still be alive!!" Guess who lost the suit? PAY THE LADY IN BLACK!

I could tell you worse stories involving suspended drivers, drunk drivers and child abusers. The courts keep reminding us that the government is you mother and those "entrusted" with the care of the community are held liable if ANYTHING goes wrong. "Officer, it should have been obvious and apparent to anyone what could have happened! You were derelict in your duties!"

If someone chooses to drive when they know they are suspended, they are making a mistake. Studies have shown that they will continue to repeat that mistake until they get caught. Additionally, they will continue to repeat that mistake after they get caught, if they have a vehicle available to them. If a cop stops a suspended driver and does not tow their vehicle, he is making a mistake. Nothing personal.

CHICKenstrip

05-26-2005, 08:17 AM

Originally posted by motorman4life
I didn't take it personal.. he tried to make it personal. I tow ALL suspended driver vehicles. ALL. No exceptions; Baby in the car, old lady, right in front of their house, ALL of them get towed. Assholish? It goes back to what Dragon wrote. LIABILITY.

To tow or not to tow wasn't even a personal decision at my agency. At one time it was, for admin-type suspensions. The driver was allowed to let a licensed driver take the vehicle in that case. So, it turns out one guy paid someone he had met hunting in the area to drive the vehicle off and pick him up at the station, once we were done with the paperwork. Guy ended up stealing his car...Actually, it was kinda funny, except that the guy (naturally) tried to sue the department. He didn't win the suit but after that, it was tow only...

brichter

05-26-2005, 10:26 PM

Originally posted by svclee
Some cops can just be mean because they are having a bad day and take it out on you. Just the way it is.

Not if you don't draw attention to yourself in the first place.

JesasaurusRex

05-27-2005, 01:29 AM

Originally posted by brichter
Not if you don't draw attention to yourself in the first place.

:rolleyes :hand

brichter

05-27-2005, 01:55 AM

Originally posted by JesasaurusRex
:rolleyes :hand

:laughing

School of hard knocks, huh, Jess?

It's ok, we almost all been there at one time or another.

JesasaurusRex

05-27-2005, 02:04 AM

Originally posted by brichter
:laughing

School of hard knocks, huh, Jess?

It's ok, we almost all been there at one time or another.

School of Infantry's The Only School I Ever Did Good In :troy :sniper

Burner

05-27-2005, 04:27 AM

Ok we all know there's asshole cops and there's nice cops. Even in the Marines there are asshole COs and good ones. The same in all professions. Let's leave it at that.

Now let's hear that Secret Service story!

halfwing

05-27-2005, 07:56 AM

This whole thread kinda quit being funny.

3 to 1 odds, any thread on BARF that exceeds 20 posts will end up with someone getting their ass kicked, spouting off with their political bullshit or in some way offering their self-righteous opinion on whatever the topic may be.

Why should this thread be any different?

I'm guess I'm not the only one who is disappointed that a thread with 5 star potential got BARF'ed..................

CHICKenstrip

05-27-2005, 08:16 AM

Originally posted by halfwing
I'm guess I'm not the only one who is disappointed that a thread with 5 star potential got BARF'ed..................

It's okay, there's still potential. As for the other issue, I would agree that "spirit of the law" doesn't exist for a lot of LEO's...

But to get this back on track, this wasn't a call but my sighting of a possible dead body down on G14 several years ago. Probably one of the most frightening scenes I've ever been at, especially on seeing a huge, lumpy Hefty bag with long, blonde hair flowing out the opening. To make a long story a little shorter, after calling for back-up...it turned out to be a blow-up doll. Hermaphroditic, as a matter of fact. Only way I could recover some pride from the whole incident was to allow the doll to make her...er, his...rounds through the lockers of those officers warned about leaving their stuff unsecured...

b.rock

05-27-2005, 10:06 AM

:laughing :laughing :laughing
That's the most awesome thing I've ever heard. Hermaphroditic to boot
:laughing

Dragon

05-27-2005, 10:32 PM

So everyone who wants the secret service story...

(DAMN! I got alot of PM's)

I will only share it with brothers over a :Port

:teeth

Dougmo531

05-29-2005, 07:52 PM

Originally posted by Dragon
So everyone who wants the secret service story...

(DAMN! I got alot of PM's)

I will only share it with brothers over a :Port

:teeth

Ok, what's the 20 for a 98 for a :Port ?

Dragon

05-29-2005, 07:57 PM

Originally posted by Dougmo531
Ok, what's the 20 for a 98 for a :Port ?

:laughing name it for a 98-

come to Pinky's on a Thursday...

rwcfrank

06-02-2005, 05:25 AM

So I see this kid riding down the street on his rocket getting his eyeball juice all over his mirrors. He knows I am behind him so he is minding his manners. a bag of weed flies out of his shirt pocket and lands on my hood getting lodged in the windshield wiper blades. So I light him up and pull him over. He is half baked feeling really good, glassy eyed and real high. I tell him that I could smell the weed in his pocket while I was following him and I know he has some on him. He swears he doesn't but I can see him sweating. After a few minutes of grilling him, telling him I know he has the weed in his shirt pocket he reaches in and finds to his relief that it is gone. He says "Officer, I did have some but it's gone, honest." I said to him " I know you did son, now go pull it off the hood of my car and get lost... He must have thought I was a mind reader....

JesasaurusRex

06-02-2005, 11:07 AM

Originally posted by rwcfrank
So I see this kid riding down the street on his rocket getting his eyeball juice all over his mirrors. He knows I am behind him so he is minding his manners. a bag of weed flies out of his shirt pocket and lands on my hood getting lodged in the windshield wiper blades. So I light him up and pull him over. He is half baked feeling really good, glassy eyed and real high. I tell him that I could smell the weed in his pocket while I was following him and I know he has some on him. He swears he doesn't but I can see him sweating. After a few minutes of grilling him, telling him I know he has the weed in his shirt pocket he reaches in and finds to his relief that it is gone. He says "Officer, I did have some but it's gone, honest." I said to him " I know you did son, now go pull it off the hood of my car and get lost... He must have thought I was a mind reader....

:laughing :laughing :cry :laughing :laughing

Now thats funny

Why do you guys have that f*cked up alphabet too, for like hte letter B you guys say bakersfield or some crap like that instead of what you're supposed to say Bravo :x :teeth