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How do you empty Doggie Anal Sacks?

If you only knew how good I am with this shit... I don't even bother lubing up, I just spit on my finger. :thumbup
 
donoman said:
If you only knew how good I am with this shit... I don't even bother lubing up, I just spit on my finger. :thumbup
Click to expand...

We need to talk...

Over here...in the closet...

No no no no, that isn't ether you smell...just look at this shiny thing...

*smother*
 
I've had dogs my entire life, and never once have the subjects of sacks or anal-anything come up. Am I just lucky?
 
I've also had dogs my entire life. But now my dog lives in my bedroom instead of the garage (my parents were different about dogs than I am) so we bathe her every 2 wks and I empty her sacks every 3 months, or whenever they start smelling like... MAJOR ASS
 
wonder what the dog was thinking while you were sticking your fingers up it's ass :laughing


you just dove right in there didn't ya, and THEN you ask for instructions :laughing you're too funny


:)
 
Don't forget to whisper sweet nothings in your dogs ear while doing this...and they like it when you buy them roses afterwards too!
 
:laughing :laughing

probably the whole m/c community in the nation is surfing BARF because of the Live 105 fiasco and they happen to see threads like these.....

Welcome to BARF.....

a place you can learn about m/c and doggy anal sacks....:laughing
 
This is cracking me up, and reminding me of when my sister's dog had puppies. She got a bad uterine infection and needed to have a hysterectomy. For about 2 weeks afterwards, my dad had to give the dog a medicated douche because my sister wouldn't. We still tease him about it.

I'm a nurse and I say - that's what vets are for. :barf
 
Holy shit, I can't believe I missed this thread.

First off, all cats have anal scent glands and that shit is nasty:shhh

Second, if your dog is 'scooting' his/her scent glands are impacted (inflammed/infected). If the excretion is like paste, this is the worst. Go to the vet for this situation. The only way to express impacted scent glands is internally. That's right, finger up the pooper, squeeze those grapes one at a time. Yuck. You will vomit.

The scent gland excretion should look like pinapple juice aka cloudy liquid. If your dog makes "stinkfish" especially while alerting (you know, barking at shit) thats a sign its time to express those bad boys. The scent glands are located at 4 and 8 o'clock relative to the anus. Locate the anal sacs (about the size of small grapes, or lymph nodes as Donoman illustrates), lift the tail, press in on the sacs with the thumb and index finger, then press both fingers together inward and upward towards the anus. Having a tissue handy to absorb that funk is not a bad idea. Good times!!!

PS a good groomer with take care of this as well. Best thread EVAR!!!

PPS food that encourages firm stools will reduce the need for you to express your pet's scent glands. I recommend Evo Innova for dogs.
 
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Ezekiel said:
Don't forget to whisper sweet nothings in your dogs ear while doing this...and they like it when you buy them roses afterwards too!
Click to expand...

Sweet Jesus I remember this thread from last year. Why on earth would you bring it back?
 
frankie said:
Here comes frankie with a link from Craigslist! As usual! http://www.craigslist.org/about/best/bos/60160142.html
Click to expand...

Why link it? Copy/paste it up dummy! :twofinger

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Grossest. Pet Story. Ever.boston.craigslist.org > rants & raves > Grossest. Pet
Story. Ever.
last modified:Thu Feb 17 12:02:32 2005
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Grossest. Pet Story. Ever.


Reply to: anon-60160142@craigslist.org
Date: Thu Feb 17 11:14:50 2005


This morning, I was assaulted by my cat in a way that I wouldn't wish on
my worst enemy. My kitties and I have a morning routine that involves
saying goodbye before I walk out the door. I was suited up, ready to go,
and I walked over to my dresser to retrieve my keys. As usual, my male
kitty was lounging on the dresser, waiting for him goodbye scratches. He
stood up to give me my usual nuzzle goodbye, and then the most unholy of
acts took place. The friendly feline stretched, and the force of his
stretch caused his anal glands to express....all over my face and in my
mouth.

Now, a little biology background for those of you who aren't in the know.
Dogs and cats have these glands in their anus that get expressed, usually
when they defecate. The smell is somewhat akin to rotting bodies that have
been dry-rubbed with gorgonzola cheese and then spit-roasted over a pile
of burning feces. Yum. Plus, like all organic smells, it tends to bind to
fabrics, which makes for a pleasant surprise when your cat rubs its butt
on your sheets or couch. But, nothing compares to being sprayed full on in
the face with this heinous slime.

At first I thought there was a drip coming from the ceiling. I looked up,
puzzled, and then the smell and taste hit me like a ton of bricks. I
stumbled blindly to the bathroom shouting, "I've been hit! I've been hit!,
puked my breakfast up, and scrubbed my face, including my tongue, for 10
minutes. The smell was still there. I called Michele in a panic and she
suggested I called the vet. I threw up again, composed myself, and made
the most embarrassing phone call of my life.

Me: "Um...hi. My cats are patients over by you and uhhh...ok. This is
going to sound crazy. Heh. Never thought I would make a call like this.
Long story short, my cat expressed his anal glands on my face and I can't
get the smell off."



Receptionist:" Hmm. Um. Let me get one of the techs on the phone for you."




I was then passed along to about 4 people in the office to explain my
story, all the while trying to ignore the howling laughter in the
background. The best they can come up with is for me to try rubbing
vinegar on my face. Desperate, I try it out. After wincing through the
sting and rinsing it off, I realize that I now smell like a delicious ass
salad. My face rapidly begins to dry out, making my skin feel tight and
itchy. I slap some cream on and scream as the sting intensifies. Scrub,
scrub, wash, wash. More panic ensues, and I hop on the horn to Michele
once again. I need to get to work, but I can't go out in public smelling
like I bathed in eau de cat-ass, can I?

We decide to pull out the big guns, and my final attack on the funky face
problem is to dab Febreeze on my face with a cotton swab. Sure, my face is
blotchy and itchy from the chemical warfare it endured, but at least I
smell predominantly like freshly washed laundry with a slight undertone of
a tossed cat ass salad. I am sure all of the odors will wear off
eventually, but the mental anguish of unwanted anal play is sure to stick
with me for a long while.



this is in or around Boston
it's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial
interests


Copyright © 2004 craigslist
 
Dear god, I can't believe I just read this entire thread. I feel dirty now. I need a shower.
 
perfect thread for these tumultuous (sp?) times!!!!
Thanks for the bumpage.
 
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