AI Generated Image Thread

[lizard]

I’m a little hungry. Gots to save ammo and choke out this MFer.

Jesus F. This fucker needs a mani.

 

[lizard]

I remembered I’m vegan so I spared the bear’s life and cooked us a vegetable soup.

 

[lizard]

Choppering out of the Uzbek mountains. Got a bogie on my ass.

 

[lizard]

Hit up Bumble in Samarkand. Search terms: triplets

Agoda-ed a roomy suite. Invited the triplets over for a pillow fight. Bear was happy.

 

[lizard]

While the Bear got all beastial with the Triplets, I went looking for a honeycomb for him.

 

[lizard]

On the way back to my elegant 6-star hotel suite I happened to find a poker game with some Uzbek thugs.

 

[lizard]

Got thirsty so ordered local vodka. Found out its made from horse piss. I’m okay with that. When in Rome…

 

[lizard]

Suddenly two assholes at my six

 

[lizard]

They fucked around and found out.

 

[lizard]

And I don’t even know how to play poker. Lulz..

 

[lizard]

So felt the urge for a sugar momma. Hit Tinder. Set search terms to: filthy rich and age over 90.

Met Veronika for tea. She owns every gold, silver, platinum and lithium mine in Uzbekistan and every oil field.

She is 117 years old, a virgin and is worth US$658 Billion.

I am hitting it tonight

 

[lizard]

We made the cover of the Uzbek Financial magazine!

 

[lizard]

Did I mention I proposed to Veronika?

Our engagement photo:

 

[lizard]

She asked me to sign a pre-nup. That fucker was 157 pages. I fake-cried. Then she real-cried and rescinded her demand. So we got hitched!

 

[lizard]

Evidently, my new bride is not a virgin as she claimed. Her grandson, Ivan, attended our wedding. Nice young man.

 

[lizard]

Veronika was embarassed that she lied about her virginity so she rewrote her will by bequeathing all her personal and real property, which surprisingly included the Hermitage in SPb (that’s St. Peterburg for all you untraveled BARFers) to me, Lizzafd.

I supposed its easier for me to legally change my name from lizard to Lizzafd than ask her to redo the will. I mean, at her age, she can check out any time.

 

[lizard]

I asked to borrow US$2M to build her a mausoleum. She got mad and asked “You want wife die?”

Had to backpedal out of that sitch. She believed me when I said “I don’t care about your billions of dollars, I just love you.”

So she cut a check. I hired Le Corbusier’s Uzbek great nephew, a famous architect in Samarkand, and a mausoleaum was designed and built on time and under budget.

 

[lizard]

So one morning I woke up and fake-cried. Veronika asked “Why cry?” I lied and said she forgot my birthday. So she bought every Chris Craft mahogany runabout for me

I forgot to mention, each boat is fully restored with only NOS parts.

 

[lizard]

And then I fake-cried again. And so she bought the Hakushu whisky distillery and relocated it to Tashkent.

 

[lizard]

And I fake-cried yet again. She asked “NOW WHAT!!!”

I said I want the original Hakushu distillery restored and relocated here along with a Space Shuttle. And so…